Restoration

“Our distrust is very expensive.” -Ralph Waldo Emerson

Do we trust God when He says to come to Him all who are weary? Or do we feel that if we rest and wait in Him, everything will fall apart? It is difficult to hold back from taking matters into our own hands. Deep down, we know God has a timing, and most times, it is not our timing.  Case and point, my husband is waiting for an Ear, Nose, and Throat appointment to discuss thyroid removal surgery. He was told by an endocrinologist last week that he needed surgery as soon as possible and a consult was sent to an ENT doc that day. And then silence. Days go by. Forever seems to pass by while waiting for action. My husband made some phone calls with concerns only to find out computer systems are down and no one can get in for an appointment. More waiting. Does God know the discomfort John has?  Does God see our concern that the thyroid seems to be more swollen?

I studied quite a bit on Sabbath Rest last year. The call to rest in God, to give Him our time, to restore our hearts and minds in Him is a learning process. In this technological day and age, information is at our fingertips at all times. We can purchase just about anything at any time, on any given day, at any given hour. But we cannot purchase the deep restorative Sabbath Rest. I am not talking about Sunday naps here, but of the deep rest which trusts God completely. To let go of one day, one thought, one action that takes us away from God-centeredness, takes determination.  In this fast paced world, waiting is a foreign concept- even in Christians. I will be sharing here and there more about this topic. It is one that is talked about quite a bit in our house. We let technology, worries, opinions of others rob us of needful peace of mind. Some answers simply cannot be found on the internet, we are learning. We have found that Google Search Engine cannot give you answers that only God alone wants to give.

 Psalm 23:3 -“He restoreth my soul: he leadeth me in paths of righteousness for his name’s sake.”

For King David to pen that God restores his soul, he must have been in a stage in life that needed restoring. It seems to me that life is a “Rest, Renew, Repeat” cycle. Whether we are in need of restoration of strength, of sleep, of right heart, of faith, our Heavenly Father is where we need to run.

Distrust in God’s plan, His timing, leads down dark roads. When God created Sabbath Rest and exemplified it, He meant it for our good. He leads in paths of righteousness and courage to trust Him for His name’s sake. The process He takes us through to return us to a place of contented trust is meant to be a testimony, for our sake and for others’. And all is meant to glorify Him in some way. We have to be still long enough, though, to let Him lead and restore. To distrust and doubt God’s ways is costly. It costs us time, energy, faith, and even healing when we go about trying to work around Him.  God is the Creator of time, isn’t He? And when we give it back to Him willingly to make use of it in whatever way He sees fit, time is redeemed or claimed as effective for His glory.

Pausing, trusting, resting in God should not be our last resort. This weekend, may we be intentional about placing the worries, the doubts, the questions in His hands and voluntarily give Him our time to rest in Him.

 

 

 

 

No Matter How Things Turn Out

“Faith is not about everything turning out okay, faith is about being okay no matter how things turn out.” -Author Unknown

It is interesting to me that this is the ‘Fixed on Faith’ post that comes up this week. I originally wrote a quick post about this months ago when I had a Facebook page and am now just getting around to blogging about it. Just recently, my husband was telling me how challenging it is to have faith that God does knows all, sees all, and has His own timing. And in that timing of His, He wants us to trust. “It is one thing to trust God with my salvation, my health, and my life,” he shared, “but to get down to the nitty gritty details about scheduling of doctor appointments, do I trust Him that much?” In the last year, he has been tested for skin cancer, and thankfully, any sign of cancer was removed in the early stage. Now he is battling thyroid problems. There have been signs for nearly two years, but it has been more apparent in recent months that something is definitely ‘off’. John is scheduled to see an endocrinologist next week and we have been waiting for the days to go by for this appointment. What could be wrong? How serious is this? What is the next step? If he had his way, the appointment would have been scheduled weeks ago before Christmas break was over. He is going back to college and a big question was if he should even start classes this semester. It could be a simple ‘fix’, sure. But since the word ‘cancer’ has been thrown out there, even a small chance, it is still a concern.  And trying to interpret blood work results can make your head spin! But the God who ensured that the doctors would see this through an MRI that was actually for shoulder pain, and the God who made it possible for him to go back to school, can He not oversee an appointment scheduled at the right time? We both agreed that, yes, He knew about the timing. We even tried to get an appointment sooner, but no openings were available. With His timing, His intention is always for us to trust Him. And we are going to be okay no matter what.

It seems as if life is full of detours. I had ideas of how I thought my life was going to turn out, and then reality hit and things changed. We have changed. Circumstances (health, of course, included) changed. But through everything, we can look back and say, “You know what? We are still okay.” And why can we be okay no matter how things turns out? Because..

“…we are more than conquerors through him that loved us. For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor powers, nor things present, nor things to come, Nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.” Romans 8:37-39

In waiting with John for answers and praying for a time when he feels ‘decent’ (his words) again with health and energy, I have to take this personally as well -not just that we will be ok, but that I will be. Faith in Jesus Christ is personal after all.

Through Christ I can see clearly, live confidently, and be fixed on faith that not only we as a couple will be more than okay but that,

  • I am more than able to overcome new territory/changes in direction.
  • I am more than able to gain or acquire courageous faith, more strength.
  • I am more than able to master obstacles and oppositions that come my way.

Questions, doubts, illness, trials, ‘nor things present, nor things to come’ – none of these are the victors. Nothing has more power than the bond we have in Christ through His love. When we are fixed (established, unmovable, settled) in our victorious faith, it is much easier to  move forward with grace no matter how things turn out.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Seeing Through The Fog

“Faith is like a radar that sees through the fog–the reality of things at a distance that the human eye cannot see.” -Corrie ten Boom

Radar: definition-  “a device for determining the presence and location of an object by measuring the time for the echo of a radio wave to return from it and the direction from which it return;  a means or sense of awareness or perception”: synonyms- direction finding, tracking system, beacon, lighthouse, watchtower

Faith is the way to determine the presence and location of God no matter what the ‘weather’. It is a means or sense of awareness that He is always there, He always cares, and He always has a plan. When my confidence in His plan is being tested, where is my focus? When my hope that He will deliver, heal, and salvage wavers, do I walk away or do I trust in the ‘evidence of things not seen” (Hebrews 11:1b)?

  • True faith does not worry or fret.
  • True faith does not become preoccupied with problems in life.
  • True faith sees any opportunity to witness the power and grace of God at work.
  • True faith is not in a hurry and will wait on God.
  • True faith keeps vision on the Source of life as He leads down “paths of righteousness for His name’s sake”(Psalm 23:3).

Let God Show Up

Sometimes my faith falters, not in my salvation, but that God will provide, heal, salvage. In the next few years, our goal is to get out of debt, have a sizeable savings account, an emergency fund, cash to pay for things, and be able to give more to missions and to other causes we would love to help. We are dreaming big here. First things first, though, get out of debt. And with our truck in the shop needing repairs, it seems we just took two steps back! Frustrating. But I need to remember that God doesn’t work in ways we understand.  He works when we become available to let Him provide without expectations of how it is to be done. I need to pray, confide, trust, and be willing to let God show up in unexpected ways.

Proverbs 4:25, 26 “Let thine eyes look right on, and let thine eyelids look straight before thee. Ponder the path of thy feet, and let all thy ways be established.”

 

 

When Grace Moves In

Practical, impulsive, short-tempered. That’s me. Like Martha in the book of Luke when Jesus was visiting in the home, I’d be the one up and down making sure all ‘needs’ were met and chores were done. I read that she has been compared to the disciple Peter who felt the need to ‘scold’ Christ (gasp!) when He was trying to show them who He was and what He was about to do. What nerve! But how many times do I find myself ‘scolding’ either myself for not ‘getting it right’ or others for ‘not getting it right’? Yikes. My heart hurts and I am convicted. Psalm 51:10, “Create in me a clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit within me.”

“Be not angry that you cannot make others as you wish them to be, since you cannot make yourself as you wish to be.” ~Thomas à Kempis

 

This week’s resolution with God post was on the study of choosing peace over perfection. It is not an easy concept to come face to face with your faults and realize that some changes need to be made. I am not perfect and I mess up daily, but this study was helpful and the thoughts I shared on Facebook throughout the week gave me a lot to think about. I hope my thoughts don’t sound disjointed but I’ll just go ahead and share them anyway and hope God will use it. On Monday, I introduced the topic of study and here are the daily notes I wrote this past week.

Tuesday: When I expect perfection out of myself or from others, it always ends in disappointment. When I lose control over my spirt (and my tongue!) in an effort to ‘be heard’ before searching out a matter fully, progress in spiritual growth is hindered. I’m working on letting God rule my sprit (and tongue!) and not my own judgements. It is not being a ‘doormat’, but is the absolute strength from possessing Christ-like humility. Not an easy thing when the habit is to be quick with words and the need is to be understood. In order to have the peace of God rule in my heart, I need to realize that it is not about wanting to change others into my image or what I think is right, but praying for God to change all to His image – starting with me. In a world where “expression” is everything these days, it feels like swimming upstream and against the current. When I come face to face with a situation where I want to ‘lash out’ and ‘express myself’, I need to ask, “At what cost?” And, “Will my words, attitude, and actions cause me to be conformed to His image or will it hinder?”.

Proverbs 25:28, “He that hath no rule over his own spirit is like a city that is broken down, and without walls”

Wednesday: I could live guilty for things I have said in haste, even after asking  forgiveness. I could ‘beat myself up’ for not getting it right. Continual self-condemnation surely will hinder. I resolve to put a priority on grace.

“When grace moves in, guilt moves out.” -Max Lucado

Isaiah 43:25, “I, even I, am he that blotteth out thy transgressions for mine own sake, and will not remember thy sins.”

Thursday: I have heard Dr. Phil say, “You can’t change what you don’t acknowledge”. I admit that sometimes I have no filter between my brain and my tongue.

James 3:13-18, “Who is a wise man and endued with knowledge among you? let him shew out of a good conversation his works with meekness of wisdom. But if ye have bitter envying and strife in your hearts, glory not, and lie not against the truth. This wisdom descendeth not from above, but is earthly, sensual, devilish. For where envying and strife is, there is confusion and every evil work. But the wisdom that is from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, and easy to be intreated, full of mercy and good fruits, without partiality, and without hypocrisy. And the fruit of righteousness is sown in peace of them that make peace.”

“Lie not against the truth” (vs 14). Owning your burdens is half the battle. We live in an imperfect world with imperfect people, but we are not left without hope. When I pause to pray first, there is a greater opportunity for wisdom to prevail. My plea is for grace to cross my heart and lips and that blessings do not come out from one side of my mouth and cursings from the other. Daily, God gives more grace when I humble myself and acknowledge that I need His help in changing me to His peace rather than my view of perfection. Lord, help me to be full of mercy.

Friday: 

Resentment: bitter indignation at having been treated unfairly
Resilience: (1) the capacity to recover quickly from difficulties; toughness
(2) the ability of a substance or object to spring back into shape; elasticity

The word ‘resentment’ came to mind in this day’s study. Expecting perfection from myself and from others always leads to disappointment and if we stay disappointed long enough, it can change into bitter resentment. In the Bible, James uses the illustration of a fountain. It cannot send sweet and bitter water at the same time. If I judge myself unfairly, it leads to resentment. If I judge others unfairly or feel judged the same, it leads to resentment.

So how do I replace the bitter with the better? How do I keep thoughts (and words) captive and live wisely? How do I give up habits of expecting perfection for habits of Godly peace? What is brittle, breaks. Brittle words break relationships. Brittle thoughts break the spirit. And brittle actions never help anything or anyone, they hinder.

When Grace is my filter, I live resilient. When Grace is my filter, I recover more quickly from difficulties. When Grace is my filter, I am able to spring back into a right heart attitude and am awake and alive to that which is good. Lord, let Your Grace be my filter for all I say and do. 

I. Thessalonians 5: 21b, “…hold fast that which is good.”

Saturday: 

-Grace will always be greater than striving for perfection.
-Grace will always be greater than my judgment of others or myself.
-Grace will always be greater than guilt.
-Grace will always be greater than the battle.

Two concepts stood out to me the most this week. Number one is that I have a choice between living resentful or learning to be resilient. In relationships, in life, in work, in ministry, I have a choice when things do not go as well as I would like. Resentment can be a bitter root. And if not pulled early, it will choke out the ability to see all that is good and right in the world.

Number two is that when I look through the eyes or filter of Grace, my view of life looks a whole lot better.

When Grace moves in, I no longer seek for perfection out of myself or others.

When Grace moves in, I am no longer rooted to resentment, but am reminded to be resilient.

When Grace moves in, I no longer serve self, but I serve the Savior.

“Marvelous, infinite, matchless grace,
Freely bestowed on all who believe!
You that are longing to see His face,
Will you this moment His grace receive?”

 

The Habit That I Wear

 

“A nail is driven out by another nail. Habit is overcome by habit”. -Erasmus

Habit: Synonyms: addiction, custom, groove, manner, mode, nature, pattern, set, style Definitions: an acquired behavior pattern regularly followed until it has become almost involuntary; customary practice or use; a dominant or regular disposition or tendency; prevailing character or quality

When I was growing up, my parents worked to instill in the 3 of us kids good habits. We made our bed every day (yes, even on Saturdays). Every day, we were to shower, comb our hair, and get dressed. Every day, we each had chores that needed to be completed by the end of the day. It was to teach us discipline and responsibility and they are habits I instilled in raising and training my son Jonathan. This post isn’t about these types of habits, however, but of spiritual ones.  One of my favorite authors, Ann Voskamp, mentions habits in one of her journal entries.

“A habit is what we wear. A habit is the way we wear our days.”

In light of ‘spiritual habits’, which ones should I ‘wear’?  I looked up the definitions for the word ‘wear’. Here are a few; to carry or to have on the body or about the person as a covering, equipment, ornament, or the like ; to bear or have in one’s aspect or appearance.

What am I carrying lately? What is ‘covering’ me? What is my equipment?? Stress, worry, doubts, perfectionism? Usually, yesKing Solomon in Proverbs 1:9 wrote about instruction and wisdom that they “shall be an ornament of grace unto thy head, and chains about thy neck.” Stress, worry, doubts, perfectionism are not wise habits to wear, especially if I believe that God is faithful to carry me through any situation.

Over the last year, I have been on a ‘minimalist’ kick. I haven’t nearly arrived at sorting through everything, but I did start with my closet. I donated bags of clothes that just didn’t suit me anymore. I stick to basic color schemes now that I know I feel comfortable in and that most everything matches most everything. I have a difficult time making (and sticking to!) decisions and having my closet cleaned out and simplified makes getting dressed much easier. Now that I have the basics I’m happy with, I rarely say, “I have nothing to wear”. I know what I like, I know what is comfortable, and I know everything ‘goes’ together.

I can compare that to a ‘spiritual’ closet and I know which thoughts are not comfortable..stress, worry, obsession over things I cannot change. I can choose to clean those out in favor of what is good. Stress, worry, doubt is really not supposed ‘to go together’ in the Christian outfit, anyway.

‘Put on’ bowels (depths) of mercies, kindness, humbleness, meekness, longsuffering.’ Colossians 3:12

In Ephesians chapter six, Paul writes about taking the whole armour of God; truth, righteousness, gospel of peace, faith, salvation, word of God… No stress, worry, or doubt mentioned here.

I can choose to decide that I don’t want to wear discontentment and doubt.  “Strength and honour are her clothing;”-Proverbs 31:25. I find that if I ‘take’ (mentally) the habits of stress, worry, doubts, obsessiveness over things I can’t control and put them away (far, far away), I find things I haven’t worn in awhile; mercy, kindness, longsuffering, faith, trust, the word of God. And if all that seems overwhelming, I can ‘try on’ one or two of them. I can work on kindness today instead of impatience. I can show mercy instead of an unforgiving spirit. I can let go of perfectionism in favor of a happier home.

‘Putting on’ habits is a choice. Driving out bad habits can be done by driving in a good one in its place. Difficult at times, sure. Painful, even. The natural tendency is to grip tightly to control, to discontent, and the right to feel this way. Which habits do I need to retire and which ones do I need to take on in order to be a better Christian, wife, and mom?  How do I wear my days? If I’m ever in doubt and am not quite sure how to drive out the bad habit rearing it’s ugly head, I can put on the one good one that never fails- charity/love.

“And above all these things put on charity, which is the bond of perfectness. And let the peace of God rule in your hearts, to the which also ye are called in one body; and be ye thankful.” Colossians 3:14,15

Above mercy, kindness, humbleness, meekness, longsuffering. Above forbearing and forgiving, charity is the way to wear my days because if I don’t have charity, I am nothing and there is no profit to any other good deed I could do (I Corinthians 13:2,3). Is my covering, equipment, or ornament charity these days? Something to think about each morning as I decide what I want to wear and how I want to wear the day.

 

 

Enabling Grace

When God has a plan, He has already made provisions for the outcome, and has given me the power to overcome any obstacles that come my way.

When Caleb, Joshua, and ten other spies were sent out to observe the land the Israelites were to overtake, the men did not all agree that God would do what He said would do and just give it to them. All twelve men saw the grapes big enough to feed giants. All twelve men saw the pomegranates and the figs of the land. They all saw that the land was overflowing with cows, and goats, and bees. The land was fertile and all that occupied it. And of course, they all saw that the people in Canaan were strong, and that there were giants, and that the cities were walled. Caleb said, “We can take ’em”…in a manner of speaking. “Let us go up at once, and possess it; for we are well able to overcome it” -Numbers 13:30. (At once!, he raved.) He was excited and ready to go. This was what they had been hoping for. A promise that was @ six hundred years in the making.

The phrase struck me while this message was being preached by my dad: “We are well able”, Caleb reported…And after declaring Canaan to be conquerable, there were others who grew weak kneed and intimidated.

•They saw the people there were strong.

•They saw the cities were walled and were very great.

•And they saw the sons of Anak, ‘which come of the giants’ (Numbers 13:33

What the 10 spies (doubters) did not see that Caleb and Joshua did,
was the almighty hand of God.

When the two “good spies” said, “We spy.. GREATNESS!”, the other ten said, “We spy.. TROUBLE!” – and a riot ensued. They protested, so much so that the children of Israel ‘got on the bandwagon’ and said it would have been better if they had died back in Egypt or in the wilderness. “They lifted up their voice, and cried; and the people wept that night”- Numbers 14:1. Good grief. Get a hold of yourself! Such drama. And what of the great Exodus? And the parting of the Red Sea? And the cloud by day and fire by night? And the manna? And and and…..on and on God was showing them that He would provide, yet they forgot. Or were just plain ungrateful. We can see just around the corner because it’s recorded how it all works out that they were —just within reach— of gaining the promised land. So close in proximity, yet so far apart from God’s mindset. They despised the promise. Maybe it seemed too hard. Maybe they didn’t want to have to ‘work for it’ when in reality, God was going to do the work and all were to receive the promise. They knew what work was. They had been slaves, after all, before God delivered them from Egypt and her taskmasters. Yet, because of their rebellion and fight against God’s will, they missed out on entering the most incredible sights they ever would know. Joshua and Caleb are hailed as heroes for their trust in God’s way. And the ten trouble making spies? They are named as well (Numbers 13) and are forever etched in Scripture for all to see their lack of judgment. In Numbers 13:3, it even says that their little ones would know the land that their elders despised.

Not much has changed since then. God still has a plan and it’s to live by faith, to trust Him in any given situation. And there will always be those who say it’s impossible to live by faith and not by sight– ‘God simply can’t have something bigger out there’. Like Caleb and Joshua, I need to stand firm that blessings will come when I simply trust that God’s way is better. Big faith = big blessings. What God says about Caleb is incredible in Number 14: 24 -“But my servant, Caleb, because he had another spirit in him, and hath followed me fully, him will I bring into the land…” Another spirit…not a spirit of scorn like the whole murmuring lot, but one of humility and obedience. And Caleb followed God fully. Fully! Not half-way, not half-hearted, but he was “all in” for the long haul. No tears. No weeping and gnashing of teeth. No drama. In vs 38, it is said of Joshua and Caleb that they “LIVED STILL” when the unbelieving and unrepentant breached God’s promise and slandered the land (vs 34 & 36). The Israelites wandered in the wilderness for forty years and died ‘by the plague before the LORD’ (vs 37). The doubters got what they wished for…to die in the wilderness (those twenty years old and up). Such profound sadness. It didn’t have to be that way.

To live STILL – when fear wants to take over. To live STILL – when I’m tempted to doubt that God will take care of me. To live STILL – when those around me are far apart from God’s mindset… Faith brings life and I am ‘well able’ to overcome anything that will test my faith in His plan…giants larger than life, walls higher than high, mean people, whatever -because He is the Enabler.

God doesn’t give me life and a plan to serve Him without making provisions. He always extends the necessary power and grace to overcome obstacles and to exceed expectations.

May I have the confidence and faith to say, “I am well able to overcome….”

Making Mention of You Always

Sometimes…I just don’t know how to pray. Illness, loss, divorce, conflicts, hardships…My heart is heavy for so many people and at times, I just don’t have the words.  What do I ask for? How do I pray? How do I form the words when the heart hurts, and the soul aches, and the mind is numb? The prayer that never fails; “Thy will be done”..but even if it hurts? Even if it means I don’t get my way? Even if someone still suffers, dies, walks away, gives up, or takes years to come back to God? My thoughts are not His thoughts. His timing is not mine. I’ve found some direction when I get to feeling numb with no words and no idea what to ask for.

“Grace to you, and peace, from God our Father and the Lord Jesus Christ. I thank my God, making mention of thee always in my prayers.”
Philemon 1: 3, 4

GRACE to you (dignity, balance, thanksgiving)–for every mile, for every trial. New grace to face a new day even when there are no answers. Dignity to accept mistakes and to receive forgiveness. Balance through a diagnosis that will change a life forever. Thanksgiving that God’s hand can still keep, protect, and guide.

and PEACE (one accord with God, tranquility, quietness of spirit)— to be still and know that He is God. Period. And He alone can fix, bend, or mend people and problems. Not I.

“Prayer does not fit us for the greater work; prayer is the greater work.”  Oswald Chambers

For those on your prayer list– for the faces you will see in your family, church, neighborhood, and even on Facebook who are smiling yet covering tears unshed–for all those on your heart and in your mind, when you find yourself making mention of someone always in your prayers…urge for GRACE, seek for PEACE. And give thanks for these gifts that He alone can wholly provide.

When the soul seeks for a voice, sometimes the only words you need to cover it all from the One Who covers all, are Grace and Peace.

The Fragments That Remain

I’m working to set up this new blog site (based on an older one) and I am reworking some of my older posts that have meant a lot to me. I may be posting a lot in a day until I’m caught up with posts I wanted to move over and as I figure out a new format in WordPress.  We were in the latter part of John 6 on a Sunday last October when my eyes had glanced over to an underlined verse on the other page;

“When they were filled, he said unto his disciples, Gather up the fragments that remain, that nothing be lost.” John 6:12

 

Fragment: 1) A part broken off or detached 2) an isolated, unfinished, incomplete part 3) an odd piece, bit or scrap

Gather: 1) to pick up 2) to bring together 3) to collect

Remain: to linger

Lost: cast away

 

The context here is the account of the feeding of the 5,000. A crowd had followed Jesus and the disciples soon after Jesus had healed a man on the Sabbath and was persecuted for it. Because of the wide spread news of Christ’s miracles, a lot of people followed him over the sea of Galilee after the healing. When Jesus saw the crowd, he asked Philip where they were going to buy bread to feed all the people. The disciples didn’t have the power to make food appear out of nowhere, nor did they have sufficient funds to purchase any. Christ knew the answer already and was going to prove His power to not only heal, but to provide. Andrew noticed a boy there who had 5 barley loaves and 2 fishes, but what were they among so many? (vs 9) Jesus instructed the disciples to have the 5,000 men (besides the women and children) sit down. He took the 2 loaves, gave thanks for and blessed the offering, and distributed the food. I had written in my Bible, “Faith comes before the miracle”. Before the actual feeding of the crowd, Christ needed to be trusted to provide. Before anyone knew exactly how this was going to supply the need, there was a moment of thanksgiving for what was about to be done. And there was enough and more.

And just a thought here about the underlined vs 12, Jesus said, “Gather up the fragments that remain, that nothing be lost.” John was the only one who remembered and recorded it this way. Matthew, Mark, and Luke all wrote about picking up the leftovers or fragments. There were 12 baskets full after the meal, but only John wrote that the fragments were picked up so that ‘nothing be lost’. John was a sensitive one– always close by Christ’s side. John must have had some insight and knowing Christ like he did, he might have figured out that something was going to be done with all that was not wanted. I doubt there was a “No Littering” sign on the lawn that caused them to pick up what was left. Were the leftovers passed around among the people? Did the disciples take them when they entered the ship to go toward Capernaum? Was it given back to the boy as a reward for his humble offering? As far as I could tell, we weren’t given that answer. But no matter what happened to the 12 full baskets of ‘fragments’, we are assured that nothing was lost. I wonder if John thought about the implications of how he recorded this miracle. I wonder if he remembered that in each of the disciples, Jesus had gathered up the fragmented pieces of their lives and did something amazing with them. “Heartaches, broken pieces, ruined lives are why He died on Calvary. Your touch was what I longed for. You have given life to me”, goes an old song.

In Christ, nothing is lost.

In Christ, nothing is lost. He works in me and through me; the good, the bad, the ugly. Fragments—broken off pieces of dreams unfulfilled, feelings of incompleteness, odd pieces of life that don’t seem to make sense or ‘fit’ in the big picture. HE can bring them all together– the hurts that remain– so that nothing is cast away. So that ‘all things work together for good to them who love God’, Romans 8:28. Faith comes before the miracle. If I have put my trust in Him for my salvation, why would I not have faith that He can take my life and use it? Can I give thanks that He has the power to multiply what is given to me, even if I become broken for His glory?

What seemed like an insignificant lad, made history. What seemed like an insufficient lunch, made a lesson in trust not only for the crowd, but for all who witnessed it and who read this account of the miracle. What we see as insignificant and insufficient is more than enough for God to do something pretty amazing. Nothing is cast away. Christ knew where the fragments went and I can be assured that every last lingering bit was not lost or wasted.

The Big Happiness

The struggle with being content is life-long, it seems. Why do others always seem to be successful when we struggle to just break even every month? I tend to look at what others are doing and what they have, but really, I don’t know their whole story. Maybe they are losing the small joys in pursuit of the ‘big happiness’. My ‘little’ that God has given me may be really all I can handle and is quite possibly just right for my life.

At the time I originally wrote this post on my former blog,  I was working through a Scripture Writing Plan. I liked this way of studying and would like to get back into it, I just haven’t yet. It gave me time to think about a concept and apply as I was writing out each passage of Scripture I was studying. The study theme at the time had been about contentment and what is actually ‘enough’ for me. And I’m not talking about basic needs but more about wants that I really don’t need. What is my motivation? To keep up with friends and family? To make it seem that I am super successful? What defines success anyway? Here are my study notes from “The Big Happiness” I wrote originally in January.

Content → (n) power of containing, holding capacity; (adj) satisfied with what one has or is; agreeing, consenting [Synonyms: comfortable, gratified, at ease]

“Holding capacity” caught my attention as did the word, “agreeing”. I’m connecting the dots here that I’m needing to agree with God that I am at my holding capacity ..at least for this moment, this day–which brings to mind the verse in Matthew 6:11, “Give us this day our daily bread”. Give me Lord, what is best and what only You know I can manage or contain. And my ‘holding capacity’ may change in the future..but that’s in the future. “Take therefore no thought for the morrow: for the morrow shall take thought for the things of itself. Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof.” Matthew 6:34. So if the evil in this world is enough for one day, so are the blessings, I would think.

“A little that a righteous man hath is better than the riches of many wicked”, Psalm 37:16. Not all wicked are rich and not all rich are wicked, I know. But when my heart is right, no matter what my possessions are, I am able to see that they are still better than anyone else’s because they are divinely given by God who knows me, loves me, and wants what’s best for me. To not take for granted the small joys in every day and in what God has given me, is the start of living life contented. To be assured that God, indeed, is in control, He knows my ‘power of containing’ for some things and lack of for others. God made us each unique in our talents, appearances, spiritual gifts, so why wouldn’t He tailor His blessings to each individual? What works for someone else, may be entirely wrong for me and vice versa. Sure, it’s good to have goals and dreams, but I need to evaluate and be willing to be ‘at ease’ in how God made me and in His provisions. To be at ease→ that’s what just about everyone wants anyway, yet it’s our level of appeasement that makes or breaks us when it comes to contentment.

At ease→ (n) tranquil rest; freedom from concern, anxiety, solicitude; freedom from constraint

To ease→ (v) to free from anxiety or care; to lighten or lessen; to move or shift with great care

And in my evaluation of what is enough for this moment, it’s quite possible the small joys in every day are the big happiness after all. To agree with God that where He has me today is where I need to be whether it be my location, my possessions, my ‘status’ in life, and that my ‘holding capacity’ for all that, is sufficient for today. God wishes to ease with great care so that I may be at ease with Him and His plan for my life – blessings and trials alike. The ‘big happiness’? Well, maybe I need to change my definition of what that means. The ‘small joys’ of being free from concern and anxiety because I’m trusting in the One who is the Great Reliever is really one big happiness.